Daisies to the funeral
by jack-adam
Summary: The death of Sirius. Straight after the fifth book. This is my first Harry Potter fanfic so plese be gentle. What happens when Harry once again visits the grave of Sirius? Please read and review. No flames, please.


The death of Sirius.

Please do not flame me.

Please read and review.

STORY

There his name was on the tombstone.

It was funny. On the day when Harry saw him slowly disappear from behind the ragged veil Harry remembered crying himself to sleep. Hell, he cried himself to sleep many nights after that, come to think of it. But as the rain poured down in buckets, he stood there alone in an empty graveyard there was just a feeling so hollow and cold that he almost forgot to breathe.

" Why did you die, Sirius?" he asked the tombstone quietly, his hands digging into the huge overcoat he had on and pulled out a bouquet of flowers. They were not roses, like what they usually put on the graves of dead people. But they were daisies. Sunflower daises for a funeral.

" Why did you die?" He asked again.

There was no answer to his question but a clap of thunder across the sky.

He sat down slowly, getting to his knees as he got in a position mostly seen during Japanese chess matches. " On the day you died, I remembered Ron telling me that it was best to continue to live my life happily and freely. He said that it was not nice and smart to sit around moping. I had to admit I. . .treated him fairly harshly when he said that to me. I remember punching him square in the jaw. But don't worry, he's fine now. Just a bit sore, but fine."

There was a rumble from the skies.

" Your name's like a swear word now, Sirius." He said. " Every time someone mentions it I just feel this sudden urge of anger and want to just hit that person in the jaw no matter if he meant my father or not."

He smiled at the grave.

" Did you feel like that when my father died?" he asked.

There was no answer.

He just stayed there in remote silence for a while before he bit his lip, unknown tears spilling down from his eyes. He clenched his fist and hit the gravestone as hard as he could. " Why did you die?" he yelled, his tears mingling with the rain, stinging his eyes. " You were my friend. My guardian."

He shut his eyes.

" You were the father I never had."

There he stayed for a while until he opened his eyes, his body not feeling the rain anymore. He looked up, and came face to face with Dumbledore. His eyes showed compassion, sorrow, and bitterness.

" I see you're here again." He said softly.

Harry got to his feet, not even looking at him.

" What do you water, Sir?" he asked quietly.

Dumbledore barely flinched. He would have reprimanded the boy for being rude. But the boy was in pain. He was in terrible pain. " Aren't you supposed to be with the Dursleys at this sort of time?" he pressed on.

There was utter silence for a while except for the soft patter on Dumbledore's umbrella.

" I ran out." He said.

Dumbledore kept quiet for a while.

" You ran out?" he asked.

Harry stayed silent.

" I ran out." Harry answered.

Dumbledore shut his eyes.

" Harry, do you remember about the Mirror of Erised?" he asked.

Harry blinked.

" Yes." He said.

" Well, this is almost exactly what happened with the mirror." Dumbledore said. " You're trapped in a room you cannot get out of, between a door you cannot open, in a box you cannot break through. That's what you're like right now. Sirius is gone, and you can do nothing about it."

Harry whipped out his wand.

Dumbledore watched the tip with slitted eyes.

" Take that back." Harry growled." And what are you going to do if I don't?" Dumbledore hissed out in a voice so cold that Harry flinched, his wand dropping down slightly. Dumbledore dropped down the umbrella, and snatched up his own wand, pointing it at Harry's wand.

" That's the problem with you, Harry." He said. " You dwell on the past way too much. You still cry about your parents, and now you cry about Sirius."

" No I…" Harry argued.

" You don't lie well." Dumbledore said curtly.

Harry fell silent.

" I know how you feel." Dumbledore said. " Believe me, I know."

Harry stayed in that awkward position for a while before he dropped his wand and slumped down to his feet. Dumbledore pocketed his wand before sitting down beside him. " I had a father once." Dumbledore said, and when Harry didn't cut in, he continued. " He was a nice man. He took what he earned, he sold what he could sell and bought what he could afford. I loved him."

Harry looked up.

" But then he was brutally murdered." He said quietly.

Harry didn't say anything.

" He was killed by his best friend."

Harry blinked. This was exactly how he had felt when he thought that Sirius was the man who had murdered his father. " I hated his guts." Dumbledore continue. " Trust me, I hated him. But there was my mother. She said that it was best not to go into revenge killing. I hated her for that."

Harry raised his eyebrows.

This was sounding all too familiar.

He looked up and was shocked to see Dumbledore smiling at him.

" Yes, Harry." He said. " Just like you hating me."

Harry blushed.

Dumbledore got to his feet.

" In the end it wasn't him who had killed my dad after all. He was working for the opposite organization, and had to pay for the consequences." Dumbledore rubbed his eyes sadly before taking out a deep breath.

Then he grinned at Harry.

" Look, Harry." He said. " The sun's come out."

Harry looked up and saw a rainbow.

A beautiful rainbow.

" Let's go." He said.

And as Harry followed Dumbledore down the dirt-ridden path he noticed Ron and Hermione standing there, waving at him frantically. His eyes widened and looked up at Dumbledore questioningly.

" They were worried too." He said simply.

A grin split on Harry's face.

That's right.

He had a life.

The past could be forgotten.

The past could be remembered.

But the past could not be dwelled upon, and now he knew why.

He took one last look at the tombstone before running down the hill, waving back at his two best friends. Dumbledore watched him run off, smiling. " You know," he said to himself. " In many ways, you and I are amazingly alike."

And he walked down, following the three best friends in their footsteps.

END OF STORY


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